Christian Ethics: Adultery - Understanding God's Standards for Marital Fidelity

Christian Ethics: Adultery

Introduction

Adultery, a topic that is both sensitive and profoundly impactful, holds a significant place in Christian ethics. God's standards on human sexuality, as treated in Scripture, emphasize the sanctity of the marital relationship. The biblical narrative consistently places adultery as a grave offense, second only to idolatry, underscoring its seriousness. This post aims to delve deeply into the biblical definition of adultery, examining its implications not only as an act but also in thoughts, as articulated by Jesus. We will explore Proverbs 5:15-23 to understand God's plan for marriage, the purity within it, and how we can safeguard our relationships from infidelity. By highlighting both the spiritual and practical aspects, we hope to provide comprehensive insights and preventive measures to maintain the sanctity and joy of the marital bond.

Defining Adultery Biblically

Adultery is biblically defined not only as voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and someone other than their spouse but also as voluntary thoughts of such activity. Jesus emphasized this in Matthew 5:28, where He said, "But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart." This expands the definition to include thoughts and intentions, not just actions.

In our contemporary culture, adultery is often celebrated, whether on television or in general media. Shows and movies frequently depict extramarital affairs as exciting and glamorous, dismissing biblical standards and ignoring the long-term destructive effects on marriages and families.

Statistics on Adultery and Broken Marriages

Studies show that infidelity is a leading cause of divorce. According to research, approximately 40% of divorces in the United States are due to adultery. This not only impacts the couple but also has profound effects on children and extended family members. The betrayal of trust, emotional pain, and financial strain caused by adultery can have long-lasting consequences.

God's Plan for Marriage and Purity

God's plan for marriage is a covenant relationship where both partners commit to faithfulness and purity. Genesis 2:24 states, "That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh." This union is sacred and should be honored and protected.

In Proverbs 5:15-23, Solomon emphasizes the importance of marital fidelity using the metaphor of drinking water from one's own cistern, symbolizing the enjoyment and exclusivity of the marital relationship. Adultery not only breaks this covenant but also dishonors God and harms all involved.

Preventative Maintenance Against Infidelity

Adultery has never made anyone's life better or their marriage more fulfilling. It is never therapeutic, regardless of non-biblical data suggesting otherwise. Understanding the covenant relationship of marriage is crucial.

Marriage is a triune relationship where God must be part of our union. Here are some practical tips for preventing infidelity:

• Never be alone with an opposite sex person who is not your spouse.
• Set a personal standard for purity and adhere to it.
• Do not expect your marriage to make you happy; let God be the source of your joy.
• Let the Word of God and the Spirit of God be your instructor and guide in all areas of life.

Proverbs 5:15-23

I. Our Spouse Is the Source of Our Enjoyment (Prov. 5:15)

Solomon uses the metaphor of drinking water to describe the enjoyment of one’s spouse. This metaphor emphasizes faithfulness and exclusivity in the marriage relationship. God intended for us to have one marriage partner, and any clandestine affair violates His clearest injunction.

II. Our Relationship to Our Spouse Must Be Protected by Us (Prov. 5:16-17)

The metaphor shifts to “springs” and “streams of water,” symbolizing the waste and spread of the precious gift of a faithful marital relationship. This highlights the importance of keeping our intimate lives private and exclusive.

III. Our Spouse Must Be Our Delight (Prov. 5:18-20)

We must take pride and joy in the spouse of our youth, always being captivated by their love. Solomon uses imagery of a loving doe and a graceful deer to describe the beauty and satisfaction found in marital love.

IV. Our Relationship to Our Spouse Is Exposed to the Gaze of God (Prov. 5:21-23)

All our ways are in full view of God, who examines and judges them. Promiscuity leads to entanglement and bondage, ultimately resulting in exposure and judgment.

Closing Thoughts

Alvin Toffler predicted that future marriages would allow for discarding partners once they are "outgrown." This reflects our throwaway society. Charles A. Reich noted that young people today desire freedom from entangling relationships, but true freedom is found in the joy and exclusivity of marital love.

Sexual intimacy within marriage is a gift from our Creator. Dead marriages are unbiblical and do not honor God. Couples must work hard to renew and grow their marriages, reflecting joy, exclusiveness, attentiveness, mystery, beauty, power, and the presence of God.

Inspired by Walter C. Kaiser, let us encourage each other to never compromise their marital love. If you are married, cherish and protect your relationship. If you are not married, choose a partner who shares your faith and values.

Reflective Questions

1. How does understanding God as the ultimate reality change our approach to ethical decisions?
2. In what ways can we ensure that our actions reflect our participation in God's reality rather than our efforts at personal or worldly goodness?
3. How can we bear witness to the reality of God's love and reconciliation in our daily lives?
4. What are the challenges we face in aligning our ethical decisions with God's will, and how can we overcome them?
5. How does our understanding of God's mandates in work, marriage, government, and church influence our daily actions and decisions?

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