Understanding Divorce Through the Lens of Scripture | Christian Ethics

Understanding Divorce Through the Lens of Scripture

Introduction:

I am happy to report that regardless of what is being published out there in regards to the divorce rate in our society; if we take the time and look at the number ourselves, you will agree with me that the divorce rate in our country is slightly below 17%. This statistic indicates that many people are committed to the sanctity of marriage, recognizing the covenantal aspect of the union where God is an integral part. Therefore, any actions taken within a marriage must be consulted with God and His Word.

The Word of God is exceedingly clear from its very beginning that marriage was meant to be a permanent relationship for all the days a couple lived on this earth (Genesis 2:24-25). Our interpretation of Scripture matters greatly in understanding the seriousness of divorce and the sanctity of marriage.

The Biblical Perspective on Divorce:

Some misinterpret Deuteronomy 24:1–4 to say that Moses gave in and finally permitted divorce because of the hardness of the hearts of the people. This is incorrect. Moses did not endorse divorce; instead, he set up guidelines to protect the summarily dismissed wife. It was all too common in the ancient Near East for the husband to declare in private, “I divorce you, I divorce you, I divorce you!”—and that was it. The wife was out—unless the husband changed his mind the next day or reversed his decision after having other affairs. What chance would a woman have for knowing her real status: was she married or in a state of perpetual divorce?

This scenario would allow the serially divorcing husband to claim he was not married (at that moment) for whatever reason he wished to present to other women. Moses put an end to that. “Mister,” he said in effect, “put that decree of divorce in writing and stick to it.” He was to write a certificate of divorce (Hebrew, keritut, literally a “bill of cutting off”).

Even though the vocabulary for “divorce” is found in both Testaments, one must not automatically assume that there were always two opposing views on the permanence of marriage in the Old Testament, as there were in Jesus’s day. It is also unfortunate that some translations of Deuteronomy 24:1–4 have added to the confusion, leading many to believe that divorce was not just controlled by requiring the husband to put it in writing, but was commanded under certain conditions. However, Moses’ intent was never to initiate the practice of divorce but to regulate it and protect the vulnerable.

Jesus' Teaching on Divorce:

Jesus commented on this same Deuteronomy 24:1–4 text and clarified that this so-called “concession” was given because of the hardness of people’s hearts (Matthew 19:3–9). Notice, then, that this law from Moses did not command divorce. What it did command was that a husband who divorced his wife and married another was not to go back to the first wife.

The Gospel of Matthew gives Jesus’s fullest and clearest statement on divorce. Matthew 5:31–32 reports that Jesus said: “I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness [Greek, porneias], causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery [Greek, moichatai].” Again, in Matthew 19:9, Jesus said: “I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery.”

Jesus taught that marriage was for life. In saying so, he challenged the two rival schools of Jewish interpretation: the stricter school of Shammai, which said “something indecent” (Hebrew, ʿervat dabar) meant some sexual impurity short of adultery, and the more liberal Hillel school, which interpreted “something indecent” to mean anything that displeased the husband. Jesus used this opportunity to set the record straight on what Moses taught, emphasizing that marriage was to be a permanent covenant, not something to be dissolved lightly.

Understanding the Covenant of Marriage:

Being reminded of the covenantal relationship of marriage is crucial in our understanding of its sanctity. Marriage is not merely a social contract but a sacred covenant before God, where the husband and wife are bound together in a lifelong union. This covenant reflects God’s unchanging love and commitment toward His people, and it demands our utmost respect and faithfulness.

To preserve our marriages, we must grow in our relationship with God, understanding His decree for our lives, and pursuing godliness. This involves extending grace toward our spouse, preparing the next generation to value and uphold the sanctity of marriage, and fostering a mindset that worships a God who is a God of transformation. We are called to instill the message of hope in those we encounter, demonstrating the enduring power of God’s covenantal love.

Preserving Marriage and Pursuing Godliness:

Covenantal Relationship: Understanding marriage as a covenant means recognizing it as a sacred bond where God is an active participant. This perspective encourages couples to seek divine wisdom in nurturing their relationship, striving for growth not just as partners but as co-worshippers of God.

Extending Grace: Marriage involves extending grace, mirroring God's grace towards us. This includes forgiveness, patience, and the willingness to work through issues with the understanding that transformation is possible through God's power.

Educating the Next Generation: Preparing the next generation involves teaching them the value of marriage as a covenant, not just a contract. It means demonstrating through our lives how to love, forgive, and commit, thereby instilling a hope that marriage can be a reflection of Christ's relationship with the Church.

A Mindset of Transformation: Believers worship a God of transformation. This belief should permeate our approach to marital challenges, believing that with God, change and healing are possible. This mindset fosters hope and resilience in marriages, encouraging couples to seek transformation rather than termination when faced with difficulties.

Hope and Witness: Every marriage that overcomes adversity through faith becomes a testament to God's transformative power. This not only strengthens the couple's faith but also serves as a beacon of hope for others, showcasing the practical application of Christian ethics in one of life's most intimate relationships.

Let us approach the subject of divorce with humility and grace, remembering that while it is a serious matter, we are also called to offer support and guidance rooted in the truth of Scripture.